Searing pain shot up my thigh as I woke up Wednesday morning this week. I could not recall ever experiencing such intense, throbbing pain. It was so bad that I feared passing out and contemplated calling an ambulance. I cried out to God for his healing presence. A typical man, I declined my wife’s suggestion I visit a walk in medical clinic. Not until I had a hot shower did the pain abate somewhat, at least enough to make it through the day.
Next day, I tried to go for lunch with two friends as I thought I might have been improving. But I found myself still painfully hobbling with a cane. When my friends saw the state I was in, they insisted I visit the walk in clinic. This time, I agreed and was issued a prescription which immediately started to take effect.
The whole experience was an epic battle with pain such as I have never waged before. I was able to trace its onset to a visit to Peggy’s Cove the previous Saturday. It was wet and foggy. I was wearing only sandals, a poor choice for the rocky trail we walked out to the lighthouse. I was soon bracing myself to hold my balance and avoid sliding into a fall.
I would have been fine had I rested my leg for the next couple of days. But silly me, I plunged on into a karate lesson and two walks up the highest hill in Halifax in two days. I now realize at some point, my body decided it had had enough mistreatment and pain became my teacher. I have had time to reflect on my time in the school of pain and have learned my lessons well.
In their book Pain: The Gift Nobody Wants, Dr. Paul Brand and Philip Yancey refer to pain as a gift from God that has much to teach us. For example, consider the child whose mother has warned him against touching the hot stove, but touches it any way. He won’t soon forget the lesson. We call that learning the hard way. We also refer to tough and painful experiences in life as the school of hard knocks.
Dr. Paul Brand worked in a leper colony for many years. One observation he noted was that lepers begin to lose their ability to sense pain. That’s why so many in the colony were missing fingers and toes. Dr. Brand realized that pain is actually a gift from God by which he teaches us many things, and actually uses it as an E.W.S. (early warning system) to prevent harm from coming to us.
For example, the person experiencing heart pains is receiving a warning that he or she needs to see a doctor immediately. Dr. Brand describes the teaching role of pain this way: “I can count on pain to represent my best interests in the most urgent way available. It is then up to me to act on those recommendations” (Brand, p. 228) .
I would like to share the lessons I have learned from my teacher called pain. For starters, it has given me a deeper understanding of what people like my wife daily endure as they deal with back pain, neck pain, muscle pain or arthritic pain. I am much more sensitized to what these people endure every day. Because of health complications, some of these people are not as fortunate as I was in being able to take the right prescription to banish the pain.
I’ve also come to realize that no matter how strong and vigorous one is, no one can push themselves to the limits of physical endurance endlessly. Times of intense exercise need to be followed with periods of rest which allow the body to heal itself. After we have exercised, our muscle pains and aching joints are teaching us to take care of our body, which for an explorer of the Way is not only a gift from God, but a temple of his presence. When I’m tempted to think I’m Iron Man, the teacher called pain raps me smartly and says, “No, you’re not.”
This is a valuable lesson for those explorers of the Way who spend their lives in full time service for God’s kingdom. It is easy to get so caught up in what one sees as the need of the moment that we constantly push ourselves until our inner resources are depleted and we collapse in mental, spiritual and physical fatigue. Once again, the teacher called pain is reminding us, “You have your limits.”
I also became aware that I was actually aggravating my leg and preventing it from healing. I realized that the way I sit at my desk as I work on my computer was exacerbating the pain. I have a tendency to crane forward as I look at the screen, with my right foot flat on the floor and my left foot curled back underneath my chair in a tense position. Every time the wheels of my chair rolled back, I was subtly twisting the knee. The teacher called pain had to whisper in my ear and say, “You are prolonging your painful situation by the way you sit in your chair as you work on your computer.”
Finally, in the moment of my greatest pain, I was tempted to cry out to God and say, “Where are you Lord when I need you? Why are you so silent?” I’ve come to realize I have a lot of company in this regard. For example, in the Bible, we find the psalmist railing against God in times of pain and anguish of soul. “Why, O Lord, do you stand afar off? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?” (Ps. 10:1) .
Looking back, I now realize God was there all along, speaking to me in my pain. He was trying to speak to me when my wife advised me to see the doctor, but I refused to listen, choosing instead to play the role of Ol’ Iron Man. God was speaking to me when I finally had the idea of trying a hot shower which became a turning point. God was speaking to me through a Christian doctor friend who gave me timely advice about proper use of the pain medication I was taking.
I have to agree with Dr. Paul Brand and Philip Yancy. Pain is indeed the gift nobody wants, but oh, what a wise teacher it is. Explorers have always been taught by the teacher called pain. By painful experience, they learn which exotic foods not to eat, which plants to avoid, e.g. poison ivy, how to search out clean drinking water, the proper precautions to maintain good health, navigational skills that can avert disaster, etc.
Looking back, I have had many teachers in my life. Some I liked very much, others, not so much. The teacher called pain is in the latter category. But I am starting to appreciate this precious gift from God. I’ve come to see my teacher in a brand new light. I’ve come to understand no matter how painful the experience, God is always with me, God is always for me, and God is always speaking to me. I just need to unplug my ears and get my eyes off my own misery.
Lets take another look at the teacher called pain and ask ourselves, “What is God saying to me in this situation right now? What am I to learn? What does God want of me in this present painful moment of my life?”
WORK CITED
Brand, Dr. Paul, Yancey, Philip, Pain: The Gift Nobody Wants, New York, Harper Collins Pub., 1993, p. 228.
explorers of the way 